Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Too hot to sleep

We've had quite the hot spell here in River City. It really took me by surprise. It was mild and beautiful one day, then BAM! Hot, humid and even hotter the next day. With the heat index around 110, our days consist of air conditioning, ceiling fans and playing in the water house out front.

Our house has two AC units. One controls the downstairs; one controls the upstairs. The upstairs one no worky when it gets super hot out. So today, it was 80 up here at noon. By bed time, it was hovering right at 90. We pulled the window AC unit out of the shed and shoved it into the landing window but, unless you sleep on the landing, the difference is negligible.

So I've been tossing and turning in bed, letting my brain wander.

I think about my friend going through a difficult time and wish I could help her.

I think about my other friend and the big changes happening in her life. She's strong but I'm glad she reached out for some support.

I think about my aloof son and hope that I'm giving him all the love, snuggles, kisses, hugs and special attention he needs.

I think about my cousin, half a world away. I think about her sweet little boy and hope that their time back in the States is super beneficial for him. I know how much my own son has benefited from speech and physical therapy and hope they are able to get some for their son while they are here.

I think about my grandmother and how much my heart just aches with missing her. So much that it's physically painful to be reminded of her and so I block out the things that make me hurt.

I think about all the projects I have my hands in right now. I've come to realize that I have a fear of succeeding - which seems asinine really. I hope that this insecurity doesn't keep me from pressing forward and doing well.

I think about my husband. This will be his last year of school. I'm so so proud of him... and a little jealous too.

I think about school ending on Thursday and not knowing what the heck I'm going to do w/ my active son at home all day! I want to be sure to keep him stimulated. I need to try to plan some excursions and events -- even if it's only sidewalk chalk on the back patio.

Now I'm going to try to read to help let my brain wind down so I can sleep. Hopefully the landlord will be able to get AC people out here soon.

PS. I think I need to call my therapist and schedule an appt.

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